


Outlier

by kylarileiza



Category: The Expanse (TV)
Genre: Dubious Consent, Dysfunctional Family, F/M, M/M, No Plot/Plotless, canon compliant maybe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-07-22
Packaged: 2019-06-14 13:25:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15389703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kylarileiza/pseuds/kylarileiza
Summary: At times, Alex seems like an outlier.  Naomi worries over this and Amos resolves to fix this with what he knows.  Alternate Summary: Amos has an interesting way of interpreting things and Naomi is just her clever self.





	Outlier

**Author's Note:**

> Many thanks to those that have already written for this cute pairing. This fandom needs more fics! I did my best! Some dub-con here due to alcoholic reasons and Amos.

Amos listened as Holden offered the crew up another apology. This generally seemed to happen about once a year- Holden would suddenly feel like he was pushing the crew too hard or taking advantage of them or something and felt the need to apologize to make up for it. Amos didn't think the apologies were needed but he suspected Holden was the type that lost sleep at night over stuff like this. Once again, Holden's main focus was their quiet and mild pilot.

Alex was quick to assure Holden that the apology was unneeded and Holden, like always, looked disturbed at how quickly Alex brushed it aside. Unfortunately, due to Alex's more passive personality compared to other crew members, he was usually the target of Holden's irritations. After all, Holden didn't want to risk upsetting Amos, it might end in his death. He definitely didn't want to upset Naomi as they were lovers and he'd very much like to keep it that way. So that left Alex, the person he wasn't making love to and he knew wouldn't kill him.

It was obvious Holden always felt guilty once he realized he'd treated Alex shitty. He'd said before Alex was probably the nicest person he knew and Amos had to agree that Alex was nice, probably too nice at times. Holden sighed. "I'll try to earn your forgiveness," he said with resolve as if Alex hadn't already forgiven him. Alex simply nodded, Amos could tell he was trying to hurry things along so it would become less awkward in the galley.

Naomi cleared her throat, sensing that Alex was starting to get a little anxious at the attention and heartfelt apology Holden felt the bizarre need to bestow upon him annually. "So, moving on, can we please talk about these prison transports again?" Because of course, they'd agreed to do prison transport again. Holden responded and he and Naomi were talking animatedly, Amos's eyes still trained on Alex, who had fallen silent. It wasn't unusual that Alex was quiet, half the time one might forget he was there except he was always saving their asses with the  _Roci._

Naomi asked something of Alex regarding the  _Roci_ in regards to the prisoners they were picking up for transport and he responded in his Mariner Valley drawl, still subdued. Amos liked it better when the pilot was hyper but that was generally only when he was actively flying the  _Roci_ and having fun. If it wasn't about flying the  _Roci_ or if what was being spoken about wasn't directly related to the  _Roci_ , Alex usually didn't speak up. Even though they'd agreed to vote on things, it was more Naomi, Holden, and Amos voting; Alex had expressed that he was perfectly content to just fly, he didn't care much about what they were doing with few exceptions.

If Amos was being really honest, it was mostly just him and Naomi voting once Holden presented the group with a contract and at that, Amos was just going along with whatever Naomi decided, so he guessed really Naomi was the one making all the decisions. They all  _said_ Holden was captain, though. When contracts became dangerous, Holden was good at taking control, so Amos respected that.

"Amos?" Naomi asked, drawing him out of his reverie. "Will you be okay with that?"

"With what?" Amos responded, blinking hard, surprised he had completely lost the conversation.

"When we get the prisoners, will you be okay being the one to escort them with Holden?" Naomi repeated slowly, but kindly. He appreciated that she didn't ask where his mind had been, she seemed used to everyone on the ship around her spacing out. She was with Holden and he could be pretty oblivious at times. Amos certainly didn't want to admit out loud his concerns over Alex. Not that Amos was embarrassed over them, but he suspected they would make Alex uncomfortable and Alex had just spent the better half of the last hour looking increasingly uncomfortable at Holden's yearly apology conference.

"Sounds fucking awesome," Amos answered with cheer that used to disturb the others, but they were all used to his nuances now. He was just glad Naomi and Alex wouldn't be down there because those two had a penchant for getting injured and Amos would rather them both not be in the medbay any time soon. It wasn't as if he and Holden didn't get injured regularly, they did. Often. For whatever reason, though, when Naomi or Alex were injured, it quickly became life threatening while Amos and Holden's injuries were painful and annoying, they rarely seemed to develop into life threatening conditions.

Amos could just envision a prisoner asking Alex a question and Alex being nice enough to entertain it and then being attacked by said prisoner. Holden and Amos would just gag the prisoners if they didn't shut up, but both Alex and particularly Naomi had an aversion to violence. Holden was an idealist but he also wanted his crew safe and Amos knew Holden was on edge when he thought the crew might be in danger.

Holden was nodding sagely and Amos had lost the thread of conversation again, tuning back in to hear Holden asking Alex something about trajectories and other stuff that Amos didn't really pay much attention to. The next words Amos heard loud and clear and he didn't like them. Holden explained that there were five prisoners that they would be bringing to Tycho Station. They were all to be on trial for eight separate murders. Naomi said something under her breath about how the trials were just for show, really, everyone knew these people were guilty.

Amos saw his vision of Alex getting hurt again except now he was being murdered and he could just imagine Naomi also around the prisoners, getting taken by surprise and also being killed. He exchanged a quick glance with Holden and the captain went on, "Being that they are considered dangerous, we will be keeping them locked up the entire time." They usually did but there had been a few times they'd let a couple more mild prisoners that were on lesser charges around the ship a little. Of course, they'd never allowed any prisoners up to the pilot's area. They only had one pilot as it was. Amos watched as Naomi and Alex exchanged their own glance and each nodded in understanding at what Holden was gently implying: stay the hell away from the prisoners.

Holden finally dismissed the group and only Alex left, making his way to the pilot's chair. Amos grinned at Holden. "You know, Cap, I'm starting to think you do this apology thing just for Alex."

Holden simply shook his head, a dull smile on his lips. "Sometimes I think I  _should_ , but just in case I'm being shitty to you and Naomi, I want to make sure everyone gets an apology."

Naomi simply rolled her eyes, moving towards the edge of the galley. "I keep you telling you that I'll let you know when you need to apologize to me."

"Same here," Amos agreed.

"But Alex won't," Holden pointed out. Amos and Naomi didn't say anything, both knowing it was true. Holden shrugged. "I just want to make sure we're all on the same page. And I don't want you two being upset with me if you think I am being shitty towards him. Now you know I've apologized."

"We never actually  _see_ you being shitty towards him. You just  _tell_ us that you were," Naomi pointed out with a raised brow.

"Yeah, Cap, you're too honest for your own good." Amos shrugged with his hands as if he were a true belter while Naomi nodded. Maybe it really was just in Holden's head and that's why Alex always looked so uncomfortable during these apology meetings. Then again, Amos could easily imagine Holden being short with Alex; he'd heard Holden speak in clipped tones to Alex before over the ship-wide comm, but it was usually during high stress situations and Amos doubted that Alex would hold it against their captain. Alex didn't seem to hold much against Amos, so it would be hard to imagine him harboring a grudge against the well-intentioned Holden.

Holden just poured coffee into his mug and shook his head at Naomi and Amos while they both left the galley, checking on something below deck that Naomi had mentioned earlier. Once out of earshot, Naomi sighed, blowing some dark curls out of her face. "I keep telling him to stop doing this."

"It's kinda entertaining," Amos pointed out with a grin. Holden's apologies amused Amos to no end. Amos wasn't the kind of guy to apologize, much less feel the need to make speeches and shit during an apology, complete with an audience. And he certainly didn't feel the need to apologize to three people when he thought he only needed to apologize to one person.

"Yes, to you and me, maybe, but I don't think Alex would agree. He doesn't like the attention." Of course Naomi would be concerned over Alex, she was always so thoughtful of everyone else and she got along well with Alex. Amos attributed it to the amount of time they'd spent on the  _Roci_ alone while he and Holden dallied about in more dangerous situations. Of course, the other two often got drawn in but only if he and Holden weren't successful in their endeavors. They'd made a considerable amount of effort to make sure they were successful.

Amos shrugged with his hands again, a Belter habit he'd picked up long ago, likely from Naomi herself. "Cowboy needs attention. Way I see it, Cap's doing us a favor."

"What do you mean?" Naomi looked at him, confused.

Amos answered as if they were just talking about the weather, "Guy hasn't been laid in well over a year now even when we're station side."

Naomi stared at him for a moment in surprise. " _Amos!_ Are you keeping track of our sexual encounters?"

Amos made no expression at that. "Not you and Cap. I assume everything's good there, not that it's any of my business."

"And Alex's love affairs are…?"

Amos did the hand shrug again. "I'm observant."

" _Too_ observant," Naomi clarified for him. "Don't go upsetting Alex with that. I'm always worried Holden is going to push him away with these ridiculous apology speeches. I hope there aren't more that Alex is subjected to that we don't know about."

Amos grinned now. "Nothing could push Alex away from the  _Roci._ He loves this ship."

"We say that, but that doesn't mean he might not change his mind one day and bail out." Out of all them, Naomi felt he probably had the least attachment. She and Holen were lovers and she and Amos had a long-standing relationship that developed well before the  _Roci._ None of them had known Alex well on the  _Canterbury._ Holden had only known him as the pilot that sometimes made him tired with his excitement about flying. Naomi and Amos had never really bothered to get to know any of the pilots, except one, who'd been Belter. Even back then, she'd had to work with Holden often while having very little contact with Alex. So it was always a fear she held that one day Alex would just not be there.

Amos just shook his head. "He's not going anywhere, Boss, trust me."

Naomi smiled appreciatively at him, hoping to plant the seed of an idea in his head. "I trust you to make sure of that."

Amos stared at her blankly for a moment, considering. After a moment, he nodded. "Yeah, I'll make sure of that." It seemed Naomi didn't understand the weight of his words or the underlying message or even what he thought she'd asked of him.  She simply smiled brilliantly at him, face lighting up with appreciation while thanking him.

***

 

It was some days later and they were still heading towards the the station to pick up the prison transports. It would take roughly sixty days to get there and then another seventy to get them where they needed to be. As Holden often liked to state, space was just too damn big. Sometimes Amos thought it could be bigger. Especially at times when his past caught up to him. Fortunately that hadn't happened lately, but he could still vividly recall Monica bringing up Baltimore and he hoped they wouldn't allow another documentary crew aboard any time soon. Then again, Amos did like money.

Amos went up to the pilot's deck where he knew Alex was. He knew Alex just slept there half the time, a habit that Naomi, Amos, and Holden had all tried to get him to break, but without much success. They really should have stayed at the station for a couple more days before heading out, but once Holden got it in his mind to go somewhere, he liked to go somewhere right away. It got the crew good reviews and more contracts, so Amos couldn't really be annoyed with Holden. When he saw the dark circles under Alex's eyes at times, though, he thought maybe he could be upset with Holden but if Alex wasn't complaining, Amos certainly didn't feel the need to. Now if Alex did complain, then Amos would happily join in and usually Naomi would, too.

"Hey," he said to Alex, who was intently checking stuff on the screens before him. If Amos had to guess, it would be more trajectory information as Alex seemed to obsess over that stuff. Which was good in his book because it kept them alive and in one piece for the most part. Alex looked over at him in surprise.

"Hey there, partner, what brings ya up here?" he asked in that Valley drawl that at times could be charming and other times annoying depending on the mood someone was in when listening. There were times where it just sounded sad and Amos suspected it was because of Alex himself. Right now, he just sounded tired.

"You didn't eat," Amos pointed out, his voice coming out more accusatory than he meant to. He wasn't quite sure how Alex had a stomach as the guy often seemed to forget about food unless he was the one cooking for the rest of the crew. Maybe it was because he ate so irregularly.

Alex didn't look away from his screens, studying them intently. "Not really hungry."

"Something exciting going on out there?"

Alex grinned, still not turning away from his screens. "Always excitin' things happening out there."

Amos rolled his eyes, though he knew Alex couldn't see. Alex was always far too excited about anything happening in the trajectory paths even if it was absolutely nothing to anyone else. He wondered if this was also how some airplane pilots were, getting all excited about stuff like cloud formations while everyone else just remained neutral about the subject. "Good to hear."

"You, uh, wanna see?" Alex ventured after a moment of silence, still not quite sure why Amos was visiting him in the pilot's deck. Not that he minded.

"Sure," Amos said, drawing himself closer to Alex and where the screens were.

Alex glanced up at him and began explaining some of the objects in the trajectory of the ship and the flight paths he could or would take. Amos really hoped he didn't look too bored. After a few moments, Alex started talking about a more interesting subject and Amos perked right up. "So, when we get to Tycho, are we going to hit the blackjack tables?" Last they'd been there, they'd won quite a bit of money. Amos thoroughly enjoyed hitting the casinos with Alex as they usually made out like bandits; every now and then one of them might get cleaned out but that was less often as they usually won a shit ton of money instead. It was ironic as they didn't really need to win money but Amos liked having extra dough all the same.

He smiled appreciatively at Alex, knowing the pilot had changed the conversation for his sake. "Hell yeah, we're hitting the casinos. What is it you say? 'The locals need to know there's a new sheriff in town?' Best way to let'em know is to clean their clocks at the casino."

Alex was impressed that Amos could quote him, though the accent was a little off. He returned the smile, eyes crinkling with affection even with the dark circles under them. "Lookin' forward to it." It would still be over a hundred days before they'd even be there but it was fun to make plans and he knew Amos would rather talk about casinos instead of flight plans and trajectory paths.

Amos nodded in agreement, then added without hesitation, "And we can get you into a brothel."

" _What?"_ Alex couldn't help but screech, the accent completely gone in his shock. That had come out of nowhere.

"Don't you want to get any? You haven't been laid in awhile and I'm just concerned about you. If everything's not working properly, we can always find a doctor."

Alex's jaw had dropped and he blinked at Amos a few times, trying to make sure he was hearing correctly. It had been a long time since Amos' abrasive personality had shocked him and he wasn't sure if it was just because he was tired but he was truly stunned. Maybe if he'd gotten sleep, he wouldn't have been stunned as this really wasn't that out of character for the mechanic. "My parts are working just  _fine,_ thank you _,"_ he made sure to enunciate each word. His next sentence, the drawl was back as he'd relaxed a bit, "I jus' don't got no interest in the brothels." He'd been to one once, sure, but it had just seemed sad to him. A lot of stuff was just sad.

"Oh," Amos said, staring at him hard. "What  _do_ you got interest in?" Alex stared at him for a moment before waving his hand at the screens in a  _don't you know me_ gesture. Amos nodded. "Of course, I knew that." There was more awkward silence until Amos finally decided it was time to go, having gleaned the information he'd wanted out of Alex.

Amos left but not without another glance at Alex. He didn't like it. Alex sounded sad; he hated that there was nearly always something  _sad_ in the pilot's twang. Amos knew he'd had a much different life from Alex, Naomi, and Holden. The three were really good people, Holden and Naomi being the kind of people one was to follow and Alex the kind of person you'd protect if you could.

He wasn't entirely sure how they'd wound up on the  _Canterbury_ with the likes of him and others like him- he knew more than one person with his background or a similar background had been on the  _Cant,_ they could spot each other out easily. Then these three all had a strange aversion to violence that Amos didn't quite comprehend. It was fine by him, he embraced violence enough for the four of them. Naomi refused to even use the guns unless in desperate need. Alex would use them, but usually would fumble and get violently sick afterwards. Holden used them and knew how to but liked to talk- god, Holden liked to  _talk._ In another life, Holden must have been a therapist. Amos just liked to shoot shit but only if it was okay with the other three. It usually wasn't.

A few more days passed and Amos and Naomi were working together again, welding something else that needed to be fixed. He appreciated the work, after all, the  _Roci_ rarely gave them trouble for the most part. She was very good to them.

"I'm working on it, Boss," he informed Naomi abruptly.

Naomi raised an eyebrow, confused. "On… _this?"_ she asked, indicating the board they were welding to the floor.

He shook his head. "No, making sure Alex won't want to to go anywhere else."

"Oh!" Naomi said, surprised he'd even remembered their conversation from before. She'd confided in him about her fear and she was glad he was taking her seriously even though she'd fully expected him to brush her off. Holden had brushed off the fear more than once saying Alex had been with them for a few years now, he was in no hurry to go anywhere. She grinned widely at him, all teeth and relief. "Thank you, Amos. I'm sure it's fine, but it would be good if someone else was as worried about it as I was."

Amos stared at her with a blank expression on his face as if trying to figure something out. He came to his own conclusion and nodded. "Yeah. I'm getting there." She took it to mean he was getting to the point of worrying about it as much as she was.

"Well, don't worry too much, I'm sure it'll be fine. You'll make sure of it, after all. I trust you."

Amos returned the grin with one of his own. "You can count on me."

***

 

They were picking the prisoners up and Amos and Holden were on the ground getting the transport to the ship. Holden had all but expressly forbidden Alex and Naomi to get anywhere near the prisoners. Not that they couldn't handle themselves- well, Amos would argue that they couldn't and should stick with what they were good at: piloting and engineering. However, Holden believed they could handle themselves, they just had a streak of bad luck and were too reluctant to shoot at things, which was hilarious coming from Holden, the most idealistic person Amos had ever met.

They had successfully brought all five prisoners aboard with Holden and Alex communicating regularly over the comm. Amos thought about how that was the most he'd really heard Alex speak while on the  _Roci,_ when he was communicating with Holden through the comm system. Granted, Amos could get Alex to really start talking when they were at the casinos and they both had a nice buzz.

Four of the prisoners had been silent, one speaking for the others the entire time so it startled both Holden and Amos when one of them spoke up and they heard the Mariner Valley drawl that usually only came out of Alex's mouth. Holden and Amos exchanged another glance and Amos could almost read him as well as Naomi now:  _keep Alex far away from this one, please._ It occurred to Amos that Naomi and Holden both seemed to think he had quite a bit of control over Alex when, in reality, he possessed none. Maybe they needed to have a coming to Jesus meeting about that.

After the prisoners had been locked away, the crew met in the galley. Holden explained everything again to everyone and Alex presented them all with the best flight path and how fast they could get there depending on the burn. They all agreed to take the path that Alex thought was best, no questions asked. They all trusted Alex implicitly when it came to stuff like this but he still liked to run it by everyone. Naomi and Amos made pasta during Alex's presentation and they all sat and ate, Alex and Naomi inquiring about the prisoners. Holden said they were a dull bunch and neither he or Amos volunteered information about the Martian prisoner with the Valley accent.

Of course, Amos and Holden should have known that Alex would eventually find out. And it took nearly forty days but somehow Alex wound up being the one to bring food to the prisoners. Amos never quite understood how he'd wound up with that task but what was done was done. The second the other Martian heard the familiar accent, he spoke up. Amos didn't know what was said but he knew it upset Alex as the quiet pilot was suddenly quieter and more closed off than normal.

And now, Amos truly understood Naomi's concerns. Alex  _wasn't_ attached to them the way the other three were attached to each other. Even after all this time Alex didn't feel comfortable confiding in any of them about why he was upset. Amos and Holden had both confided in Naomi and she had confided things to both of them. Amos resolved to fix this. He suspected he knew a way. He just wasn't entirely sure if it was the  _best_ way, but it was what he  _knew._

Amos didn't put his plan into action right away, wanting to wait until they got to Tycho Station and see how it would play out there. He didn't like leaving Alex to stew in his own mind over whatever the Martian prisoner had said to him. Amos and Holden had made it a point to make sure that neither Alex or Naomi had an opportunity to be around the prisoners again. Naomi was a little annoyed but she understood the sentiment and she didn't want them further upsetting Alex, either.

They made it to Tycho Station and the prisoners were brought to their new prison, thankfully off of the  _Roci._ Amos felt relief in a way he hadn't in awhile. Normally, he was pretty unaffected by all of it, but it still irritated him that one of them had upset Alex. Still, he could incorporate this into his plan, assuming all went according to plan. He thought, not for the first time, that Naomi would probably be better in this plan, but she was clearly busy with Holden. Which was fine, absolutely fine with Amos and he knew that was fine with Alex. He just wasn't sure how much Alex would like this plan.

But Amos couldn't help but think that Naomi was right: Alex needed to be more attached to them. He was their only pilot and it would be hard to find a replacement pilot- not many people would be willing to do some of the crazy stunts Holden asked of Alex, plus Amos didn't think many would take too kindly to Holden's speeches. Or who knew, maybe another pilot would require daily apology speeches from Holden. That was all they needed. As if Holden wasn't grandiose enough with them, getting those on the daily would be more than Amos could handle. And Amos didn't want a different pilot.

Amos had talked Alex into coming to the casino with him. The pilot had been reluctant at first but Amos had reminded him that he'd said he was going to go to the casino with him. Amos knew that Alex and most people from Mariner Valley considered their word as good as a promise and Amos might have taken advantage of that and he had no regrets or remorse about it.

Alex had a bottle of tequila and was taking generous swigs from it. It was supposed to be whiskey, but Amos might have paid the bartender extra to disguise the tequila as whiskey. It must have been working as Alex was happily drinking from it. Amos made sure the bottle was replaced with a new one before Alex even realized he'd emptied one- then two, and now three. Amos was drinking but not quite as much even though he held his alcohol better. Maybe the issue with Alex wasn't food so much as alcohol. Maybe Alex was an alcoholic and they just hadn't really realized it. That would probably explain a lot. Either way, he was relieved that Alex was generally a happy drunk, getting almost as giddy as he did when flying the  _Roci._

After winning about ten grand at the tables, Amos decided they should head out as Alex was emptying his third bottle and his words were starting to slur more than usual and his movements were getting jerkier by the moment as if he was really concentrating. Alex laughed when Amos commented that they should probably call it a night. He protested for a minute but Amos was soon grabbing him and pulling him up out of the booth.

Alex stood for a moment before blinking hard and nearly falling back into the booth, only to be caught quickly by Amos. Alex leaned heavily against him, commenting that the whiskey was way stronger than he remembered. Amos felt a pang of guilt for his tricks but it didn't last long as he remembered Naomi's concerns and his own regarding Alex.

They left the casino after proudly cashing out, both grinning like fools while the cashier counted out the scrip. Amos made sure to support Alex, happy he hadn't blacked out yet, he was sure that would come eventually. Once outside, Amos decided to feel Alex out some before carrying out his plan. "You sure you don't want to hit a brothel, Alex?"

Alex frowned at him, confused and a little annoyed even through his drunken haze. "Yess, I alr'dy told ya, I don't got no interest," he slurred, his Valley accent much more pronounced when drunk.

"Why?"

"They're sad."

Amos stiffened. "Why?" Alex remained quiet and Amos repeated the question. "Why?"

"Remind me of someone," Alex mumbled, trying to string words together and trying not to give too much away, though he suspected Amos already knew that he was talking about him.

Amos was quiet for a long moment. "I ruined the brothels for you?"

"Not you," Alex tried to insist, wanting Amos to understand that  _Amos_ himself hadn't ruined anything. He just couldn't consciously use those things knowing what all they entailed. "'Sides, never been one much for'em." It was true. He had been very faithful to Talissa during their marriage.

"Wanna go to a bar then and pick some chicks up there?" Amos asked, knowing Alex had frequented bars in the past.

Alex shook his head. "Jus' wanna go back to the  _Roci."_

Amos was quiet again for another long moment before nodding. "Okay, we'll go back to the  _Roci."_

Alex looked at Amos in surprise. "You're coming, too? Figured you'd get a room at the brothel or somethin'."

"No, I wanna make sure you make it back okay."

Alex looked a little offended. "I can get back on my own." He added more sincerely, "Don' wanna ruin your fun."

"I am having fun," Amos stated and realized it was true. He was having fun with Alex. And maybe it was the alcohol or Naomi's request or his own plan or just the way he was, but Alex was suddenly looking very attractive and he felt he could do this. He could go on with his plan and get Alex attached to him. Well, he could  _try_ , he still wasn't quite sure he had the right plumbing but that didn't always matter on the Kinsey Scale. He hoped this would be the case with Alex. He'd already offered him two outs and Alex didn't seem too concerned.

Then again, he hadn't really told Alex what he was heading into. Three large bottles of tequila should really make one open to other possibilities, though. Which probably wasn't really  _right_ but Amos wasn't planning to go  _too_ far anyway. If he could just get Alex to maybe  _think_ about it. He certainly wouldn't complain if Alex made any moves, though. Which he had not, just some mutterings about the  _Roci_ and her damned flight plans as if Amos wasn't having an internal moral crisis at the moment. He thought about Holden and Naomi and what they would do. Well, they wouldn't have given Alex an excessive amount of tequila. Even so, as long as he didn't go too far, it would be fine. Everything would be fine. He just needed to make Alex happy, that was his goal. Happy and attached.

Alex stumbled a little and Amos tightened his grip on him, feeling that guilt again over the tequila but not enough to rat himself out. "Whoa there, don't want you meeting the floor." Alex just laughed as he allowed himself to be pulled in a little closer and tighter and he continued on about flight paths and the various ones from here to Ceres and from here to Mars and from here to Earth and from here to wherever the hell else and Amos allowed him to keep happily talking about them as they approached the  _Roci._

"Amos, she didn't go anywhere! Ain't she great? Just waitin' 'round patiently for us to get back ta her," Alex happily droned on about how great the  _Rocinante_ was in his drunken drawl and, for whatever reason, Amos was finding himself actually turned on. He wasn't sure if it was actual attraction or just because he was excited for the challenge that awaited him as they drew closer to their ship or both. Or maybe it was just that stupid accent that was even more obvious when Alex was drunker than shit. Alex allowed himself to be dragged into the ship, eyes wide like a kid in a candy store as if they didn't spend every day of their lives on the  _Roci._  "I'm home, baby!" Alex greeted the ship and Amos rolled his eyes. Between Alex and Holden, he wasn't sure which one was cheesier, he was pretty sure they were at a dead even tie at this point.

"She says welcome back honey," Amos good-humoredly responded to Alex's greeting. Alex grinned sheepishly, aware of how much he spoke to the  _Roci_ like she was an actual person. Amos went on, "Is this who you fantasize about, Alex?  _The Rocinante?"_ And Amos would swear that Alex turned three shades darker than normal even as he tried to sputter denials. Amos barked with laughter, his grip tightening again on Alex as he felt him slipping downwards again. "It's all good, I gotcha. Let me help you to your cabin."

Alex tried to jerk away suddenly but failed spectacularly and was glad for Amos's grip on him otherwise he would have fallen face first to the floor. "I can get to my cabin, partner. Go have fun, you don't gotta babysit me." Of course, he obviously couldn't get to his cabin but he certainly wasn't going to say that out loud.

"Not babysitting you." Amos's voice was flat as he said it, hoping to drive the point home. The last thing he wanted was for Alex to think he was staying with him out of some sense of obligation. "I'm with you because I want to be."

Alex smirked at him. "I'm sure you'd find better company in your brothel." He meant it kindly and Amos knew it but the mechanic still wanted to make sure that Alex understood Amos was choosing to be in his company.

"I like this company better."

Alex stared at him for a moment, unsure if he'd heard right. After a moment passed, he figured he must have, "Uh, thanks. That's real nice o' ya ta say." He was aware that the Texan twang the Valley had inherited was coming on a little more strongly than normal but it was out of his control. He had to wonder again what exactly he'd been drinking. "Like your company, too." It felt a little weird to state it as he didn't think they'd have been flying together this long if they didn't like each other's company.

Amos was eyeing him in a way he'd never done so before and Alex shifted suddenly self-conscious. Was Amos going to make some comment about how Alex should probably drink less and work out more? Alex was brought to his room and Amos said something intriguing. "You don't get upset easily." It was an observation and not a question but Alex answered it anyway.

"No, not really. Sometimes. But….. why?"

His response was lips on his and Alex wasn't at all prepared, stumbling backwards right into his crash couch, groping blindly at something to regain his balance but the only thing there was Amos. And Amos was a demanding presence. Alex froze for a moment, unsure what to do, his mind having trouble registering what was happening as reality, his body trapped between the crash couch and Amos, his mind caught somewhere between wanting to push Amos away and his lips wanting to open and let Amos have his way.

Amos pushed his luck, still demanding access to Alex's mouth as the pilot froze beneath him, having fallen back into his couch in shock at Amos's advance. Even though he'd seen Alex be assertive at times, he'd mostly seen Alex be too nice; Amos suspected Alex would be too nice to push him away, whether he wanted to do this or not. Amos pressed harder against Alex's lips, his tongue flicking out, desperately wanting inside because Amos liked a good challenge. Alex was definitely a challenge as he was still completely frozen as if he couldn't decide if this was real or not. Amos supposed it probably had come out of the blue for Alex, though Amos had been planning this for quite some time now. He nearly groaned with relief and gratitude when Alex finally responded and his lips parted, allowing Amos to fully kiss him.

Amos wasted no time in getting his tongue into Alex's mouth, sweeping over the teeth and sucking on bits and parts here and there, trying to rob Alex of all his breath. Alex was starting to make sounds and Amos knew that was a good sign. He was still half expecting Alex to come to and kick him in the groin but that had yet to happen and Amos wasn't planning to take it past this, not with how utterly drunk Alex was. This would be enough for now, but Amos had to make sure it was the  _best_ kissing experience of Alex's life and he was fully committed to that challenge.

Alex's own tongue hesitantly slipped into Amos's mouth and he allowed the access and for a few blissful moments there was just tongue and each other before they had to break apart for breath. Amos muttered against his lips, "Just pretend I'm the  _Roci_ ," he advised with some humor, still concerned Alex might decide to kick him out, that maybe he'd gone too far. Alex made a non-committal noise and Amos was kissing him again, one hand creeping downwards to see if Alex was even turned on because if he wasn't, this was going to be a serious issue later on.

He couldn't tell but that hand palming at his member through the jumpsuit seemed to break the spell that had come over Alex and he jerked back and shook his head as if just waking up. "Wait a second,  _what_  are you doing- why. Why are you doing this?" And Amos tried not to be too alarmed that the accent was all but gone which normally only happened when Alex was under duress. Amos backed off a little, prepared with an answer but Alex answered his own question before he could, "Wait. Is this- is this because of that thing Naomi is always worried about? She has discussions with me about how she's worried how I might leave or somethin'." Amos's silence was the answer he suspected and Alex sighed, sad and long. "Amos, I'm not goin' anywhere, you don't have to go through this for my sake."

Amos bit his lip because before they'd kissed he might have let the subject drop, but now it was a challenge and one he was quite  _enjoying_ and he didn't want to stop now. And maybe he'd also had a little more alcohol than he should have. "I want to make you happy." It was true. More than wanting to get Alex emotionally attached to them, he wanted to make the pilot happy because he sounded sad more than happy over half the time and Amos wanted to fix that. That's what he did. Fix things.

Alex's eyes were affectionate but he was still firm. "You don't hafta do this, Amos. This isn't-" but he was cut off by Amos.

"You don't like it?" Amos made a show of looking rejected.

Alex swallowed thickly, feeling caught between a rock and a hard place. "I didn't say that."

"Then what's the issue?" Amos asked, his lips still dangerously close to Alex's own, staring hard into Alex's eyes, trying to demand he go along with this.

"This ain't something you hafta do," Alex desperately tried to explain, wanting Amos to understand this wasn't something he had to do. "You don't need to do this. I'm not leaving anytime soon."

Now Amos was getting annoyed because he was really wanting to do this and he had to remind himself who Alex was and not to get rough with him despite the temptation. "I want to do this." Of course Alex was a stupid good person and would be thinking of  _Amos_ and not that Amos had gotten him ridiculously drunk so he could do this. And that oblivious kindness was not turning Amos off at all, quite the opposite.

"Do you?" Alex asked doubtfully. Amos narrowed his eyes at Alex's doubt and realized no words would convince the other man so he simply took one of Alex's hands in his own and guided it to his own groin so Alex could palm at the fabric some and feel that he was turned on.

"Believe me now?" Amos asked huskily, lips still practically on Alex's. There was a delightful sound from Alex's mouth and Amos was kissing him fully again, open mouthed and all tongue and Amos was pushing Alex further down into his crash couch, thrilled at how submissive Alex was being. He really shouldn't have been surprised but it still excited him. If Alex kept acquiescing like this, he might go much further than he was initially planning to. The soft sighs and gasps and vulnerability beneath him certainly wasn't slowing him down, either.

***

 

They didn't leave the  _Roci_ the rest of the time they were on Tycho Station which was five days in total. Amos still felt a little guilty about getting Alex so drunk and going  _that_ far. He was sure Holden and Naomi would be upset if they ever found out. He was fine being Alex's dirty little secret and told him as much. Alex hadn't seemed too keen on the whole dirty secret thing but would go along with it for now. Amos really wasn't sure if he'd suggested the dirty secret for his own sake or Alex's. He thought Alex was too good for him, really. And Amos suspected Alex thought Amos was too good for him, oh the sweet irony.

Holden looked surprised to see Amos and Alex both already on the ship when he arrived on the  _Roci_ with Naomi. They had all gathered in the galley to discuss their next steps. "Did you guys already get cleaned out at the casino? Usually, I have to drag you away from there."

"We decided to roll out while we were ahead this time, Cap," Amos informed him. Holden had told them more than once they'd double their winnings if they stopped betting half of it away, not that he ever minded when they lost a few thousand dollars considering all the money they'd saved up in their account. Alex simply nodded in agreement.

There was some more discussion and Holden presented another contract he'd managed to get while on the Station. All voted for accepting the contract and Alex pulled up the best flight plan and gave an estimate of how long it would take. As they were wrapping up, Holden broached the subject again, "Are you guys sure you're okay with leaving? We can stay another day if you want." That said a lot that Holden was willing to wait another day. He glanced between Alex and Amos as if trying to figure something out.

"I'm good," Amos said, doing the Belter shrug.

"I'm good, too," Alex assured Holden. Holden waited a minute and nodded while Naomi quietly watched the whole exchange also trying to figure something out. The atmosphere in the galley felt different than usual, that's what was throwing Holden off. But it wasn't a bad different, it felt… _friendlier._ She could see why Holden was confused as it was throwing her off, too.

"Okay," Holden said, deciding to let it go. "Alex, can you get us ready to go, please?"

"Sure thing, Chief," Alex easily agreed and began to walk out of the galley towards his pilot's chair. Amos cringed slightly as he watched Holden and Naomi watch Alex. He was walking with a slight limp and Amos felt a bit of guilt, but immediately squashed it. It's not like Alex had been drunk each time. They'd done quite a bit in the last few days.

"Uh, Alex?" Holden ventured hesitantly. Alex stopped and turned towards him, waiting. Holden went on, "Hey, buddy, everything….okay?"

Alex frowned at him. "Yeah, everything's great. I'm gonna get the  _Roci_ ready," he told Holden, surprised he was already reminding him what he was doing. Holden simply nodded dumbly, unsure what else to say. Alex left the galley and Holden turned his attention to Amos.

"Can you make sure that whatever he's doing, he's not going to keep limping like that? He probably got too drunk and fell or something, but that could have been way worse," Holden was rambling on, already concerned and irritated at once. As far as Holden was concerned, he and Amos had an unspoken contract when station side: Holden looked out for Naomi and Amos was to look after the pilot. Alex limping even slightly was a sign Amos wasn't doing his job.

"I made sure he can't go anywhere," Amos tried explaining through a grin.

Holden's frown just deepened. "I don't really know what you mean by that, just make sure he doesn't hurt himself anymore."

"On it, Cap," Amos said with a mock salute. Holden shook his head and left the galley with his mug of coffee, leaving Amos and Naomi alone. Naomi's dark eyes glittered with suspicion as she studied Amos.

"Amos, what did you do?" she asked slowly.

Amos lifted his hands in the classic Belter shrug and continued grinning. His mouth hurt, he'd been smiling so much the last few days, but he still smiled in spite of the soreness. "I did what you asked. Told you, you could count on me." Everything seemed to click in Naomi's brain- her request, a few of the conversations she'd had with Amos since, some of Amos' words and looks, the friendlier atmosphere, Alex's slight limp…

" _Amos!"_

**Author's Note:**

> If any lovely people gifted with porn prose wanna fill in some of the gaps I left, I'd be totally thrilled!


End file.
